Charlie Weis And The Chocolate Factory

If It's Mangino, Expect This Blog to Resume in Force

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 20:23:00 +0000

So Fucking Fired

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 20:21:00 +0000

No Comment

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 21:55:00 +0000

Things Georgia Gubernatorial Candidates Have Stuck Their Penises In For $500, Alex

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Fri, 01 May 2009 22:13:00 +0000

Georgia gubernatorial candidate Neil Horsley is running on The Creator's Rights Party ticket. He's anti-abortion and gay sex, except for when it's experimental, and is extremely in favor of killing abortion doctors -- even going so far as to publish Old West-style wanted posters (the U.S. government asked him to stop doing this, characterizing it as "too subtle"). He's also admittedly anti-American, pro-secession, and is generally in favor of terrorism.

Oh, and he's fucked a mule. And a watermelon. And "just about everything it's physically possible to have sex with, and some that isn't." Say what you will, but at least an anti-abortion/pro-bestiality philosophy offers those kids a plausible alternative to doin' the nasty.

Anyway, to our Georgia readers, you know what to do. Palin/Horsley 2012, baby!

Best Swine Flu Cartoons

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 22:15:00 +0000

It's Like He's Speaking My Soul

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Sat, 14 Mar 2009 03:15:00 +0000

Matt Taibbi has a sports column at Men's Journal. It's the perfect combination of vitriol, snappy prose, and bald sensibility that fans of his know and love.

Brett Favre: Honestly, if I hear that fucker’s name one more time, I swear I’m going to drive a bus full of kids off a cliff. There must be numbers from some marketing genius somewhere that show that every time his face appears on TV, two more hicks in Arkansas buy bags of Cheetos and five more pill-popping trailer housewives decide to blow off making home lunches and spend their welfare checks feeding their kids at Applebee’s. I guess I understand it. Football skills aside, Favre is, wrapped in one package, everything that attracts the attention of the superfluous sports hack: an emotional story line about a deceased “hero” dad; an activist, cancer-surviving wife who likes the camera and who never hesitates to go on at length about her and her husband’s “awesome” relationship; an inspirational recovery from pill addiction; a willingness to go on air with Greta Van Susteren; and a seemingly endless, once-a-year, will-he-or-won’t-he retirement controversy. Favre is also a half-literate white southerner who played in the northern Midwest (from a marketing point of view, he’s like both halves of a presidential ticket), giving him natural appeal to all the key demographics. As much as I can’t stand Favre, I’m hoping he outlives me, because the Tim Russert effect after his death would be overwhelming.

Offered Without Comment

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 21:08:00 +0000

Oh, wow.

CORPUS CHRISTI, Texas (AP) - Seven employees at a state-run home for the mentally disabled have been suspended for allegedly staging a "fight club" among residents.

TGRWT #15: Smoked Salmon & Dark Chocolate

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Sun, 22 Feb 2009 21:42:00 +0000

One of our favorite food blogs, Khymos, runs a monthly event called "They Go Really Well Together." They pick two ingredients that aren't commonly used together -- but scientifically should be compatible -- and challenge bloggers to create a recipe featuring the pair. Here is our first foray into the unknown, featuring this month's pair: smoked salmon and dark chocolate.

Smoked Salmon Cigars with Dark Chocolate Mole

Cigars
(2) 4.5oz packages Smoked Salmon
8oz whipped Cream Cheese
Lemon, with zest
Salt & Pepper
Phyllo dough
Butter, melted
Dark Chocolate Cocoa Powder

Combine cream cheese, lemon and zest. Salt and pepper to taste. Fill half sheets of phyllo dough with a strip of salmon and the cream cheese mixture, rolling dough into a cigar shape. Brush top of cigars with melted butter. Bake at 350 for 10-12 minutes, or until tops are lightly browned. Dust with cocoa powder.

Mole
Sesame Oil
Onion, diced
(6) cloves Garlic
3.5oz bar Dark Chocolate
28oz can Tomatoes
(6) dried Guajillo chiles
2tbs Pasilla chile powder
(10) Black Peppercorns
Mexican Oregano
Cinnamon
Cloves
Allspice
Fresh Thyme
Fennel Seeds
Tortilla, shredded.

Saute onion in sesame oil. When translucent, add all other ingredients to taste. Simmer for at least 45 minutes. Strain if desired.

Garnishes
Chives
Shaved Dark Chocolate
Lemon Zest
Sesame Seeds
Sesame Oil infused with Chiles

Serve cigar in a pool of mole, and garnish as desired.

RESULTS

Surprisingly, this worked exceptionally well from a flavor standpoint, and looked terrific (despite photographic evidence to the contrary). I wanted to make sure that the two featured ingredients were, well, featured. While the dark chocolate was assertive but not overpowering in the fairly simple mole, I thought I needed to up the chocolate factor a bit. The the shavings provided little bursts of chocolaty flavor, but weren't a distraction. The salmon/cream cheese cigars had a fantastic taste and consistency. Note that the lemon adds a needed hit of acid and lightness, and the sesame/chile oil helped tie everything together.

The only knock on the dish was that the phyllo wrappers weren't quite crisp enough. Were I to make these again, I'd probably use a slightly higher temp on the cigars, crisp them in a skillet, or substitute egg roll wrappers or puff pastry. A crunchy wrapper would make this a real winner.

Oops, I Crapped My Pants

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Sat, 17 Jan 2009 00:22:00 +0000

(click pic for hi-res)

For those of you who are not up to date on this story, it appears that at a tailgate for the BCS National Championship game, an AOPi from the University of Florida ... weeeelll:

Received via third-hand email: "My friend saw this girl squatting near his tailgate for the [national championship] game [Thursday] night and thought she was just pissing until she stood up and came over to talk to them. That's when they noticed..." [ed. note: doody]

For reasons of common decency, Georgia Sports Blog later took down the pictures, which were printed in redacted format at Every Day Should Be Saturday and Deadspin (wow, this girl's life is toast). Fortunately, this blog suffers from no such constraints, but we have yet to get our hands on an unedited picture (hint, hint).

Now comes the investigation. Who is she? Where are her sketchy Facebook pics? Only you, dear readers, can help. We'll get you started with the UF AOPi website. Onward!

(does a bear shit in the parking lot?)

We're pretty sure the only thing that can save this chick now is a face transplant, and she'll doubtless be getting the boot from her chapter. Regardless, the girls are going to have to suffer through years of "Alpha Omicron Pi is such a shitty sorority" jokes.

Dripping Kuntz Ready For Action

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Sat, 22 Nov 2008 22:05:00 +0000

This afternoon's Notre Dame -Syracuse tilt descended into a one-sided snowball fight as Irish fans justifiably pelted their own sorry-ass excuse for a football team:

When the Irish defense held a meeting on the sideline, injured linebacker Brian Smith stood on a bench to try to shield his teammates. But when a snowball hit defensive tackle Pat Kuntz, he stood and faced the crowd and appeared to challenge whoever threw it to come down on the field.

Quarterback Jimmy Claussen threw a wobbly snowball in the culprit's general direction, but his attempt was intercepted and eaten by Charlie Weis.

Palin In Uneasy Embrace With Gay Community

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 18:45:00 +0000

Tha Carter Loves the Green Wave

noreply@blogger.com (QB) — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 16:09:00 +0000

Lil' Weezy is a Tulane fan...but keep it on the low.

Some people were also asking if I like college sports, and the answer is yes, I do. For college football, my favorite team is LSU, of course. On the low, I'm a little bit of a Tulane fan as well. My assistant, she's a Tulane graduate. We almost had East Carolina this year but I ain't gonna say nothing about that.

Georgia - Alabama

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 01:35:00 +0000

I blame Larry Munson.

Shanespotting

noreply@blogger.com (QB) — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 22:51:00 +0000

Learn it. Live it. Love it.

Shanespotting

Charlie Weis never recruits shanes. Never.

What The Hell?

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 23:10:00 +0000

Via UmpBump:

In a bizarre drama, Hideki Matsui announced on Thursday that he has secretly gotten married, but he refuses to divulge the identity of his wife, showing only sketches of her drawn by himself and his brother.

What made the whole situation even more bizarre is that Matsui may have married her in order to win a bet he made with teammates Derek Jeter and Bobby Abreu.

Offered without comment. This is all very confusing.

Random Bitching About CBS' NCAA Coverage

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 22:46:00 +0000

As a casual college basketball non-fan, I freely admit that I know nothing about the game and only watch it while gambling. Perhaps some of you hoops diehards can clue me in on a couple of things:

Why the hell does CBS (or the NCAA, if that's who is making the decisions) run multiple games at the same time? I get the fact that they don't want their viewers stuck watching a blowout, but it sort of sucks that 75% of the country didn't get to watch one second of O.J. Mayo in the tournament. And don't give me some crap about how spacing out the games (even to the extent of adding extra days) would hurt revenue at the arenas, cause travel problems, or hurt the "students'" academics -- ticket sales are chump change, logistic problems are solvable, and basketball players don't go to class. Assuming the games are valuable ratings-grabbers ... wouldn't you want to show more of them?
Who is the midget playing for Xavier?

Mr. McFadden's No Good, Very Bad Day

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 17:52:00 +0000

MSNBC:

Reid, Turley and Lieb are among more than 800 customers who responded to the first wave of marketing for do-it-yourself DNA paternity tests sold as Identigene by Sorenson Genomics of Salt Lake City.

...

Results are reported online, by phone or by mail in three to five business days. They come back as a probability figure that verifies paternity with 98 percent to 99 percent accuracy, Watson said.

What?!?! Oh, shit.

Atonement, Part 2

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 01:10:00 +0000

All good things come to an end, and the greatest thing we've seen in a while is Can The Cubs Mend My Heart?

The author was a recently dumped Chicago fan who dreamed of a Cubs championship ... and his girlfriend coming back to him. Unfortunately, well, people on the internets are big meanies, especially to soul-baring douchebaggery. The site has now been taken down, but you can go here to see some of the best parts.

Tulane Baseball Update: The Hitters: March 25

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 23:30:00 +0000

Week in Review:

Mar 23, 2008	Tulane Green Wave 12, Sacred Heart 0	Box score
Mar 22, 2008	Tulane Green Wave 5, Sacred Heart 2	Box score
Mar 21, 2008	Tulane Green Wave 8, Sacred Heart 0	Box score
Mar 19, 2008	LSU Tigers 7, Tulane Green Wave 5	Box score

Well, the cannon fodder scored on us this weekend, but the story was much the same. By Game 3, Sacred Heart's depth was more or less shot to hell -- the umps could have called mercy sometime in the third inning and everyone would have been happier. Again, I think pulling any conclusions from the weekend slate of games is silly, and WE SHALL NOT SPEAK OF THE MIDWEEK GAME.

HITTERS:

	AVG	SLG%	OB%	EqA
Jared Dyer	0.375	0.556	0.413	0.308
W. McFadden	0.349	0.476	0.468	0.318
Aja Barto	0.333	0.500	0.418	0.308
Rob Segedin	0.329	0.468	0.391	0.284
A. Scelfo	0.301	0.534	0.463	0.322
Seth Henry	0.296	0.507	0.359	0.290
A. Rodgers	0.273	0.527	0.403	0.294
Drew Allain	0.237	0.322	0.338	0.226
Sam Honeck	0.237	0.342	0.341	0.217
Josh Prince	0.164	0.164	0.246	0.113
Marc Robert	0.500	0.750	0.500	0.428
R. Rebowe	0.500	0.750	0.400	0.378
Steve Moritz	0.385	0.385	0.500	0.292
Scott Powell	0.300	0.433	0.382	0.276
N. Boullosa	0.154	0.154	0.214	0.090
G. Griener	0.000	0.000	0.400	0.149

Go here for complete stats.

Observations:

Scelfo is quietly having the best season on the team. Even during his early-season "slump," he still showed enough plate patience to be a valuable cog in the lineup. Now that his "traditional" stats (AVG, power numbers, etc.) are coming around, he's headed towards a monster season.
WoMac Revival, baby! We're still hearing rumors about hitches in swings and bad approaches at bat, but they're easy to dismiss with the numbers he's been putting up. Watch closely when we start to see some decent pitching, though -- if the numbers bottom out, the problems aren't fixed.
Prince. Let's be clear -- he's in the lineup because he plays good defense and he hit .371/.448/.449. in 89 ABs with Texas last year. At what point, though, does past performance have to be disqualified as a fluke? I'm not saying we should give up on him yet -- the sample size of ABs is still a bit low -- but RJ better be working on a backup plan, because Tulane's lineup doesn't have enough pop to hide a gaping black hole.
Again, I'll believe that we're a good offensive club when we hit against a team with a pulse.

Tulane Baseball Update: The Pitchers: March 25

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 23:29:00 +0000

Player	ERA	BB/9	K/9	WHIP	dERA	BABIP
S. Hunt	0.56	4.22	12.66	0.781	1.974	0.179
J. Garrett.	2.31	3.51	7.01	1.126	3.667	0.262
R. Broach	3.25	4.96	4.96	1.654	4.509	0.337
A. Loup	3.56	2.69	6.28	1.196	3.972	0.300
T. Rogers	0.00	5.40	12.60	1.000	2.095	0.200
Mason Griffin	1.88	2.55	7.02	0.851	3.876	0.216
P. Claiborne	2.31	4.82	9.64	1.607	2.653	0.353
T. Martin	2.51	2.55	3.83	0.922	3.205	0.209
M. Petiton	2.84	5.90	7.38	1.475	5.804	0.313
N. Pepitone	3.00	4.50	5.00	1.278	4.968	0.275
J. Zeid	8.31	4.39	7.68	2.439	5.136	0.471
TULANE	2.65	3.87	7.43	1.225	3.690	0.290
Opponents	6.41	4.74	6.75	1.697	5.028	0.359

*dERA is defense-independent earned run average. This is a component-based stat, so think of it as what a pitcher's ERA should be.

Observations:

dERA seems to think Petition, Broach, and Griffin are pitching a bit over their heads. High walk rates are the culprit for Petition and Broach, while Griffin's BABIP (batting average on balls in play) may be unsustainably low.
Don't get your panties in a bunch over Shooter's jump up from ERA to dERA. The system is designed for a long season, and not league or park adjusted (yet). That said, it's unlikely that Shooter's BABIP stays quite that low, and he is walking quite a few people.
Loup may deserve a little more credit than he's getting. If he can bump that K rate a bit, he could look great on paper. Anyone know whether Loup is a primarily groundball pitcher? Just curious, but that could explain his relatively high BABIP and low K rate.
Our defense is quite good, judging by these statistics. According to dERA, it is saving us about 1 run a game, which is an enormous number. I'm going to recheck a few things this weekend -- the discrepancy may have something to do with variances between the college and major league game (I used MLB rate stats in the calculation).
Shooter Hunt is getting some great press across the internets, and it was nice to see my new favorite site, Saberscouting, run a feature on him.

Pitch - Present Grade/Future Grade [ed. note: baseball scouting is done on a 20-80 scale]

Fastball - 65/70

Curveball - 65/65

Changeup - 45/50
Command - 45/50

...

Power pitcher but struggles with command in spurts. Sometimes spots his pitches as well as anyone but can fall out of his groove incredibly quickly. Lots of walks, lots of strikeouts. When on, he’s got frontline potential. Plus makeup, plays to win, great competitive attitude. Must learn to pitch, not throw. Huge upside.

Go read the whole thing -- it's a nice breakdown of his mechanics, his upside, and his warts. At this point, we're talking about a top-15 pick, assuming he holds up against better competition. If he sharpens his walk rate, then watch out.

Tulane Baseball Update: The Week Ahead: March 25

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 23:28:00 +0000

This Week's Schedule:

03/25/08	at Southeastern Louisiana	Hammond, La.	6:30 p.m. CT
03/28/08	at UAB* *	Birmingham, Ala.	7:00 p.m. CT
03/29/08	at UAB* *	Birmingham, Ala.	2:00 p.m. CT
03/30/08	at UAB* *	Birmingham, Ala.	1:00 p.m. CT

SELA goes with Adam Jones tonight. He's started three games this season, but really hasn't stretched out at all, pitching only 13 innings total (he also made a relief appearance). He appears to be a pretty solid pitcher, but don't look for him to go much past 3. After him, SELA has a mishmash of average middle relievers. Efferson, their other midweek starter (who we may see tonight) has been knocked around this season. Hitting-wise, SELA has a core of Hargis-Summerlin-Street, and not much else. They should be out of their depth tonight, but remember that they did knock off LSU earlier this season (throwing a weekend starter, granted).

UAB is the weekend matchup, and it should be a nice way to start the conference season for Tulane. UAB has more or less been beaten like a drum by anyone and everyone this year, and they haven't exactly played great competition. First baseman Ryan Keedy is having a monster of a year, and Bell and Stewart are average players, but the rest of the team might as well be swinging wet newspapers. On the mound, Wallace and Klostkowski are decent starters, but UAB is a giant question mark after that. 9 different pitchers have started games; 8 others have pitched in relief. This should be a perfect week -- anything less would be a disappointment.

Atonement, Continued

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 20:10:00 +0000

This has been kicking around various sites, but we've watched it at least twelve times and it's still making us laugh. Summary: Patrick Roy's (he's a famous hockey goalie, apparently) son's hockey team gets in a fight, and Junior wants to participate. The other goalie isn't wild about the whole fighting thing, but Roy solves that problem by beating the ever living crap out of him. Really, it's worth three minutes of your time.

Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 03:36:00 +0000

If true, at this point, we should be slightly more popular your favorite grandmother. Seriously, folks, we apologize -- we went on vacation under the impression that we'd have internet access, and that obviously wasn't the case.

We're back now, and we swear we'll make it up to you. For now, enjoy this picture from Poon of the SEC, encapsulating many of the reasons that you should have gone to school in New Orleans.

Classy.

Tulane Baseball Weekend Review: March 17

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 16:49:00 +0000

Week in Review:

Mar 16, 2008	Tulane Green Wave 16, Oakland University 0	Box score
Mar 15, 2008	Tulane Green Wave 19, Oakland University 0	Box score
Mar 14, 2008	Tulane Green Wave 3, Oakland University 0	Box score
Mar 12, 2008	Tulane Green Wave 18, Northwestern State 11	Box score
Mar 11, 2008	Tulane Green Wave 4, Northwestern State 3	Box score

Five patsies, five wins. You'll note the 38-0 showing the Mighty Oakland Something-0r-others put on this weekend. In short, a weekend due to inept pitching, full of pings and thwacks, signifying nothing.

Blah blah blah everybody's stats look great:

	AVG	OB%	SLG%	EqA(Nat.)	EqA(CUSA)
W. McFadden	0.346	0.460	0.462	0.315	0.312
Jared Dyer	0.339	0.381	0.554	0.298	0.296
Rob Segedin	0.333	0.395	0.464	0.279	0.277
A. Rodgers	0.333	0.444	0.644	0.335	0.332
Aja Barto	0.323	0.400	0.508	0.303	0.301
A. Scelfo	0.267	0.429	0.517	0.308	0.306
Seth Henry	0.259	0.295	0.448	0.248	0.247
Sam Honeck	0.239	0.329	0.358	0.219	0.220
Drew Allain	0.226	0.339	0.302	0.218	0.218
Josh Prince	0.184	0.273	0.184	0.129	0.134
Steve Moritz	0.455	0.556	0.455	0.332	0.330
Scott Powell	0.429	0.467	0.643	0.346	0.343

Go here for complete stats.

Five items of note:

I think it's safe to pencil Rodgers into that cleanup spot for the remainder of the season.
Seth Henry, extra base hit machine? We'll see if this continues. Scelfo, on the other hand, continues to produce despite ugly "traditional" stats.
The pitching is deep and dominant. It'll be interesting to see if Loup does well against better competition this week.
Broach's peripherals still look terrible. Watch him closely.
I'll believe all of these Candyland fantasies when we perform against a team with a pulse.

Shooter Hunt, 2008 All-American and top-15 draft pick. Sound about right? Anyway, we have another "baseball team" coming to slaughter this weekend in Sacred Heart ... and of course there's that meaningless midweek game.

Go to Hell, LSU!

Yes, Stupider Than Berman

noreply@blogger.com (GG) — Sun, 16 Mar 2008 19:07:00 +0000

Just a quick note to say that the opera singer on ESPN's NCAA coverage is the dumbest damn thing I've ever seen on the network. And this from a channel that gave us Battlebots.